Bear with me on this, Dear Readers. No, I haven’t lost my marbles. You should know me better than that!

The trouble when the M word is involved is, we all have to tippy-toe around and be very careful what we say or write.

As you know, I’m a well-travelled Food & Travel Editor. I love the Muslim countries. I love their food, their décor, and their warm hospitality.

If we want guaranteed good service here in the UK, we often go in a corner shop run by Muslims, Sikhs. Hindus or some other religion. I don’t care about their beliefs. It’s none of my business. I care about them as Human Beings, and their attitude. They don’t scowl and slam the door in our faces because they’re shutting in five minutes! They make us welcome and tell us to take our time.

I was an Air Hostess when the mad Idi Amin chucked the Indians out of his country and seized all their wealth, and I’ve always remembered their pitiful bundles of belongings and their sad, shocked faces as they sat on coaches with no idea of where they were being taken.

We welcomed them all to our country, as did other Nations, giving them free housing, food, etc. And to give them credit, they had all moved out of their free accommodation within a year, worked hard and started their lives again.

So where have all these loonies appeared from? They seem to have sprung up in a very short time. They’re not Muslims and it’s no use their pretending they are!

And please don’t blame the Muslims for their  behaviour.  Don’t stoop to their level and go attacking innocent people!

My theory? Just look at them, posing around in front of the cameras with their pals, clutching their brand new rifles and machine guns, which are obviously a phallic symbol.

Nobody shoots a police woman in the back for a religion.

They’re not really Terrorists. They’re Serial Killers. I think they get a sexual kick out of what they do, because they’re physically lacking. They’re just a bunch of cowards with big problems who have discovered like-minded criminal cronies.

And the M word? They’re all Males! Notice that I don’t say Men! They’re definitely not real Men! Real Men don’t throw hissy fits over such silly little things as they do.

Real Men don’t kill innocent people who they’ve never even met!

Oh, and another thing, it’s against the law to make any Racist comments, but it’s perfectly legal to criticise religions. That’s interesting, isn’t it?

Back to the Laughter.

One of the most important things in Life is a Sense of Humour, which these loonies don’t have. They never even smile! No wonder they’re so miserable and fed up with the world.

Who kills over cartoons, for goodness’ sake? Murdering innocent artists over paper drawings? Do they really think they’re right in the head?

Who’s pulling their strings, arming them and brain-washing these gullible Patsies to do what they want them to do?

I’m sure that if Jesus and his Disciples were alive, they’d find cartoons of themselves absolutely hilarious. I expect that Jesus would ask his Dad to frame them all!

Despite their history of persecution and suffering, the Jews have got a unique, wicked sense of humour! And our Christian vicars and priests can usually tell a good joke. They need to, to keep their Congregation awake!

The Parisian Cartoonists have been brutally murdered because they were witty and humorous. They gave pleasure to millions of people.

It was very moving to see the crowds gathered to mark their deaths, and mostly in tears.

Their Cartoons should be held up in the Church at their funerals and everyone should laugh loudly; so loudly that everyone outside can hear them, and join in.

Laughter is infectious.

Many years ago, laughter saved me from being raped. He grabbed me and I looked at his stupid face, and got the giggles. You know how you can laugh when you’re nervous?

Guess what happened? It worked like yawning. He started laughing too until we were both in uncontrollable fits! Then I punched him on the shoulder, said, ‘Oh, you!’ and rushed away.

So don’t hold Silent Vigils to remember the terrible deaths of these innocent artists; hold Laugh-ins! Tell jokes, wave pictures around, and LAUGH! Let the sound rise upwards and outwards, across the Universe.

They can’t kill or gag the whole world. Humour is a matter of taste and we’ve all got the right to decide what makes us laugh.

You never know, we might even convert some of them, when they realise that our gang is much more fun and normal than their gang, and we’re actually very nice people!

They might decide to join us in the Real World, in the 21st Century!

If you’re likely to find something offensive, don’t go there, hoping to get a masochistic pleasure out of being offended! Go somewhere else! Leave the heavy stuff for the Grown-ups.

Let’s prove that ‘The pen is mightier than the sword!’

We should start a campaign;  FUNNIES FOR FREEDOM.

And we should all join hands and LAUGH!

ilaugh cartoon