Hatem with his sister.

By : Hatem Dhwibi

Witnessing an event or an experience is alot of fun, alot of acknowledgment, but living it would be much more different. Marriage is a committment, and it is also a lifelong adventure, i witnessed and lived it, not as a groom but as the bride’s brother.

The preparations for the wedding start way before the wedding date, every single one we know get involved, males and females, the ones who live here also the ones who live far, they bring their families and come, it was like planning to start a project. My sister and her females team were taking care of everything the bride needs, the small things and the big ones, not even one detail should be missed, they buy what she will need in her new home, carpets, utensils, dishes, plates, portraits, spoons, knifes, pillows, curtains, covers, couches… everything, then they take care of her outfit, buying clothes, makeup and all cosmetology’s tools, shoes…etc, and the sweet thing is that the bride buys gifts for her future husband and his family or his mother, things like perfumes, pyjamas, shampoos… etc. The question here would be whose paying for that ? The bride and her family does and of course i paid a big part of that as i love to take care of my spoiled sister, she is my closest. I also made a team, a males teamwork made up of me, my friends and neighbours and our relative., First thing we took care of was preparing our home for the wedding, painting and maintenance and so, we also took care of the wedding invitations, mouth to ears and written invitations, we bought everything needed for cooking, vegetables, meat, fruits and all foodstuffs. The most important part of the wedding is the music, so we contacted musical bands, modern and traditional bands, chairs and tables for guests, decoration stuff…etc.

A day before the wedding, we took my sister to the ancient city of Kébili for a visit to who we call here ‘the righteous parents of Allah’, these are people who were too good and too close to God, they come in status after prophets, visiting their shrines has became a tradition for their symbolism. The next day, people from both the bride’s and the groom’s families meet, we went to the municipal palace where they will sign their marriage paper and make their oath, a ceremony accompanied with applauses, ovations, music.. a celebration we all were waiting for, the couple were so happy, smiling and laughing. Three nights of celebration, guests with a variety of costumes, loud music and alot of dancing, people taking pictures with the bride while she is sitting on her royal chair, cookies and drinks, fireworks.. sometimes people fight but it ends up peacefully, it is really amazing to see too many people living as one small family. We didn’t want my sister to go, many of us almost cried, alot of us did, i did not knowing if it was because i am happy for her or because i know that it will be hard for me not having her around, my two brothers and my other sister were feeling the same i guess, my mother was happy and sad at the same time, i know what she was feeling too.

Everything went right, the wedding passed the way we planned it, people who haven’t seen each others since long have met, all guests were satisfied, and i was so exhausted, i knew that having a wedding is a lot of work but as i was the number one responsible, i saw the truth about it, i realized that some things need to change one day.

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