Cabin towel origami

Cabin towel origami

We’ve just had a wonderful week’s cruise with Thomson’s. We enjoyed every minute of it.

What a difference from our Costa Cruise From Hell last year!

COSTA DIADEMA; another Costa disaster waiting to happen at sea!

Thomson's Majesty in Teneriffe with rainbow

Thomson’s Majesty in Teneriffe with rainbow

We flew from Gatwick and were welcomed at Gran Canaria airport, where the Tui sign was right in front of us as we came through Arrivals.

The coach whisked us away to the ship, and our luggage was delivered to our cabin within half an hour.

Then we went up to the buffet restaurant on Deck 10 where there was a wonderful choice of food, all fresh and hot or cold. I had a salad and Hubby John had fish with chips and vegetables.

Lovely fresh buffet food

Lovely fresh buffet food

There are around six restaurants on the ship, all free except for one gourmet restaurant. Two of them are a sit-down waiter service. But the food and the service is very good in all of them.

You can find something to eat 24 hours a day if you want to!

Delicious restaurant meal

Delicious restaurant meal

There are two theatres, a casino, shops and lots of bars.

You can always find something going on, like towel folding or singing lessons.

As the ship sails at night, we always went ashore in the daytime.



A Danish ship called the Aida visited the same ports as us. As it was bigger than the Thomson’s Majesty, it left after us and arrived there first.

The Danish and Germans wore trousers and hiking boots. They were all slim and walked briskly or rode bikes.

They seemed to have bikes on board the ship.

The only walking sticks to be seen were Nordic hiking sticks.

The Brits often wore shapeless shorts which showed their shapeless legs.

Around 75% of them were overweight. They walked as though they were in pain, shuffling slowly, bent over with their protruding bellies stuck out in front.

Sometimes our boat looked like a hospital ship as the wheelchairs and walking sticks came on shore.

We sometimes felt ashamed to be British. We stood up straight, breathed in and increased our pace.

Why are we such an overweight nation? I’m sure the Danish ship had as much food on board as our ship. And I know that the Europeans drink as much if not more than we do!

Does the answer lie in exercise, or is our diet different?

Most passengers are unaware of all the hard work and training that goes on behind the scenes.

There are 1400 passengers and 600 crew members.

I spoke to Fiona who is the Thomson’s Company Representative on board the Thomson Majesty. She told me about all the duties that the Social & Welfare Hostess has to cover.

They include; Celebration Package Arrangements, hosted tables on formal evenings, Blessings (this is a renewal of vows,) behind-the-scenes arrangements, like champagne birthday arrangements.

Around 60 people per cruise have a birthday while on board!

My birthday greeting

My birthday greeting

I had my birthday on board and awoke to find a birthday message and balloons stuck to my cabin door. And I passed birthday messages and balloons everywhere!

Then there are the welfare responsibilities, like adapted cabins for wheelchairs.

This information will be included in the booking.

If someone needs to fly home early because of a family bereavement, the Social & Welfare Hostess will arrange the flights.

She refers anyone who is taken ill on board to a hospital ashore, and often accompanies them there.

And she will discuss it with Insurance Companies and the family at home.

I then spoke to Tayler McCullough, the Cruise Director. He runs the overall Entertainment Dept on the ship.

He works long hours as needed, but does get breaks during the day, plus trips ashore. He also gets five weeks a year at home.

There are 30 of them in the entertainment team, and they’re all qualified in Sea Survival Training, with Safety of Life at Sea.

They must also pass a medical to work at sea.

They hold a Mandatory Crew Drill once a week, usually at a port when the ship’s quiet.

Drills include fire fighting, First Aid, Security, survival techniques at sea, eg how to turn a lifeboat over, and how to use the equipment on the lifeboat.

They also practice crowd management, how to deal with piracy, and Man Overboard.

The Show Team has to undergo 11 weeks’ rehearsal ashore, then two weeks’ setup period on board, with dress rehearsals, technical checks and adjusting to the size of the stage.



Tayler is the Face of the ship. He makes the announcements and would have to announce any emergencies.

I asked him the silliest question he’d ever been asked, and he said, ‘Do the crew stay on the ship?’

I’ve heard it before and I thought it was an Urban Myth, but apparently it’s true.

His 2nd silliest question, which he gets asked a lot, is ‘How do you get upstairs?’

Tayler studied at Drama School from age 18-20. He loves it on ships. He said there’s a great cameraderie on board.

They have a great Captain who is a nice man and approachable.

Would we go on another Thomson’s cruise? Yes, definitely. It’s excellent value for money. All the staff are happy and friendly. And we visited some interesting places.

I can’t wait for my next cruise!

When we fly from Gatwick, we always book reservations in the No 1 Lounge.

It’s often better value than the main airport. All food, drinks, newspapers, plus a good view of the planes, are included in the price.


No1 lounge, Gatwick North offers guests a range
of stylish areas including a chic island bar, elegant
bistro, Sports Bar, library equipped with a private
meeting room, and a wide-range of comfortable
lounge seating.
Guests who purchase No1 lounge, Gatwick North
access via will also receive
complimentary security fast-track allowing them to
skip the queues and spend more time in the lounge.
For further information, high resolution images,etc
please contact
The award-winning No1 lounge, Gatwick North
is one of three ‘super-lounges’ in the collection.
Bookings can be made online at
Priority Pass, Diners Club & IOD members welcome
Open 4am – 10pm daily
• Complimentary hot and cold food options
from the pantry table and bistro
• A selection of juices, soft drinks, speciality
teas and bean-to-cup coffees from the
• Award-winning wines, beers and spirits
are also available from a tended bar
• Free, unlimited WiFi
• Quality newspapers and magazines
to take on board
• Classic board games
• Runway views
• Cause for celebration? Add a glass or
bottle of champagne for a small price
Walk up: £35 per adult, £18.00 per child
Advance: £28 per adult, £16 per child

About Lyn

LYN FUNNELL CV (well, sort of!) Lyn had very successful careers as an Air Hostess, Sales Rep, (she was one of only a couple of women. She beat all the men regularly, becoming the Top Rep in the UK, and 2nd in the world.) And then Catering took over. She did everything from the washing-up, to Silver Service Waitress, and Chef. A few times, she had to cook the meal, dash round the other side and Silver Serve it! In between all this, she wrote as often as she could, building up a reputation as a published short story writer, (Horror and a twist in the tale,) and a Poet. She has appeared as a Performing Poet, and a Demo Chef. Then she discovered the world of the Food & Travel Writer. And that’s what she has continued doing to this day. Her main hobbies are Cookery and entering Competitions. She has won many prizes, including holidays and a moped. She enjoys entering Competitions, submitting her original recipes. She was first in many Competitions, including the Good Housekeeping Millenium Menu, Fruits of France, Bernard Matthews Turkey Recipe, and appeared on BBC’s The One Show Spag Bol contest. She was one of three Finalists, coming 2nd, which makes her Britain’s Spag Bol Queen! Now she runs B-C-ing-U! and loves it! After several years of being messed around by Editors, and having loads of contacts, Lyn formed her own online Magazine, vowing to treat her writers fairly, and to do everything possible to further their careers, publicise their books, etc. She now has a band of excellent regular writers, and the Magazine’s going from strength to strength! Lyn’s online published books; Adverse Camber A collection of my published poems. The First Book of Short Stories The Second Book of Short Stories The Third Book of Short Stories. Many of these stories have been previously published. St Anthony of Padua. The Patron St of the Old. A story of one woman’s terrible ordeal in a Home, and her family’s rescue of her. The Girl Who Watched. A Cuban girl is attacked by an English journalist & what follows! Willy the Whizz & the Wormhole. Suitable for Young Adults, aged 15-95! Get Out Of Debt And Stay Out – Forever! Unsympathetic, hard-hitting, realistic solutions to your problems. All these books are published by Andrews UK Ltd No, I didn’t pay them to Vanity Publish! They’re all available from Amazon, and many other online publishers. LYN FUNNELL.