Every year I go to the Destinations Show at Earls Court.
It’s a smallish, friendly show with lots of interesting stands.
The trouble is the boring old people who go. I’m sure that some of them only come out once a year, and use it as a chance to bore the pants off everyone within a yard’s voice range!
The poor sales people on the stands have to listen over and over again to these old people’s history of holidays. Their eyes glaze over and they force a smile on their faces.
earlscourtmedMy friend went off and came back again, and said she’d waited behind one old man who was rambling on about a holiday when he was six!
Old people are so selfish and self-centred too. They don’t care about other people queuing behind them while they ramble on. And they’re totally unaware of the painfully bored expression on their victim’s face while they drone on and on.
I often rescue sales people whose face lights up at the sight of me and shout, Oh, excuse me a minute! to shut up the Old Person, who usually shuffles away to bore his next victim. But some of them stubbornly wait, to return to their holiday tales when I’ve gone.
Don’t think, Aaah, poor Old Person, they’ve paid to get in and it’s probably their only outing for ages. They’re actually depriving businesses of customers while they jam their bodies in front of everyone and drone on for ages about themselves. Most potential customers will move onto another stand and perhaps book a holiday there instead.
This year I had a deep-fried caterpillar on an African stand. Acceptable, but the legs stuck in my teeth!
On the Albanian stand I mentioned Norman Wisdom and the young lady’s face lit up. She’d seen almost every film that he made.
She told me he’s known as Pigskin in Albania!
Sadly though Destinations won’t be at Earls Court any more as the old building is due to be demolished, which is a terrible loss for London. So it’s back to Olympia, where it used to be held. And dear old Earls Court will be a block of flats, or something like that. What a shame!
Maybe they’ll make it an Old People’s Home. They can all move in there and talk about when they used to visit Earls Court’s holiday shows, then they can discuss their lifetime’s holidays with each other.

About Lyn

LYN FUNNELL CV (well, sort of!) Lyn had very successful careers as an Air Hostess, Sales Rep, (she was one of only a couple of women. She beat all the men regularly, becoming the Top Rep in the UK, and 2nd in the world.) And then Catering took over. She did everything from the washing-up, to Silver Service Waitress, and Chef. A few times, she had to cook the meal, dash round the other side and Silver Serve it! In between all this, she wrote as often as she could, building up a reputation as a published short story writer, (Horror and a twist in the tale,) and a Poet. She has appeared as a Performing Poet, and a Demo Chef. Then she discovered the world of the Food & Travel Writer. And that’s what she has continued doing to this day. Her main hobbies are Cookery and entering Competitions. She has won many prizes, including holidays and a moped. She enjoys entering Competitions, submitting her original recipes. She was first in many Competitions, including the Good Housekeeping Millenium Menu, Fruits of France, Bernard Matthews Turkey Recipe, and appeared on BBC’s The One Show Spag Bol contest. She was one of three Finalists, coming 2nd, which makes her Britain’s Spag Bol Queen! Now she runs B-C-ing-U! and loves it! After several years of being messed around by Editors, and having loads of contacts, Lyn formed her own online Magazine, vowing to treat her writers fairly, and to do everything possible to further their careers, publicise their books, etc. She now has a band of excellent regular writers, and the Magazine’s going from strength to strength! Lyn’s online published books; Adverse Camber A collection of my published poems. The First Book of Short Stories The Second Book of Short Stories The Third Book of Short Stories. Many of these stories have been previously published. St Anthony of Padua. The Patron St of the Old. A story of one woman’s terrible ordeal in a Home, and her family’s rescue of her. The Girl Who Watched. A Cuban girl is attacked by an English journalist & what follows! Willy the Whizz & the Wormhole. Suitable for Young Adults, aged 15-95! Get Out Of Debt And Stay Out – Forever! Unsympathetic, hard-hitting, realistic solutions to your problems. All these books are published by Andrews UK Ltd www.andrewsuk.com No, I didn’t pay them to Vanity Publish! They’re all available from Amazon, and many other online publishers. LYN FUNNELL.